Tania, Author at Tania Beaudoin

What happens in a therapy session?
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What happens in a therapy session?

Therapy 101

What happens in a therapy session?

Starting therapy can be terrifying. If you have never tried it or have never heard from someone first-hand what it was like, it can be like walking into the dark. People often wonder what takes place during the therapy session. To be honest, every session varies. Among therapists and even with the same client, things can look different from week to week, but here are a few things to expect:

Check-in: Sessions usually start with a quick check-in. This can include developments from the week or changes in the home that impact your daily life. It can be brief, but it gives the therapist a good landscape to know what other factors are contributing. For example, a car accident earlier in the week or the results of a medical test can be the source of worry and sleeplessness.
Homework Review: If homework was assigned, there should be time to review it. Some therapists will go through an exercise in detail, others just want your reaction to trying it.
Exploration: This is a vague heading, but there is a good chunk of the session devoted to exploring the subject matter that is presenting an issue for you. For example, it could be time spent exploring a fight with your significant other – what happened, what was said, the impact, how you handled it, how you did/could apply your skills. This often involves a mix of story-telling on the client’s part and socratic questioning on the therapist’s end. It may sound like a conversation you could have with a friend, but it’s often more extensive. As a therapist, I am guiding you to connect this to your goals, look for patterns, problem-solve, and ultimately have some moments of growth.
Interventions: This may or may not be explicitly separate from the rest of the session, but it involves the education and practice of a technique that can help you cope and problem-solve. Sometimes I am very explicit about practicing mindfulness, doing it as a game at first. Other times, we may be exploring a topic and I can introduce something naturally. It is always my intention to practice these new skills in session, they can be hard at first and if we can practice in a controlled setting, then it is much easier for you to implement this outside of my office.
Wrap Up: Think of this as the other bookend to the “Check In.” We are planning for upcoming sessions, discussing homework, and talking about issues that may come up in the following days. If the session has been a particularly difficult one, there should be times spent on ensuring that you leave grounded and de-escalated.

Most often therapy sessions are fluid and evolve organically. You get to bring in your concerns each week and lead the conversation. My job is to act as a guide or navigator as we explore. It’s okay if you’re still hesitant, but hopefully this helps!

By Tania|2019-10-11T17:12:31+00:00December 1st, 2017|Therapy 101|Comments Off

What if I’m not ready for therapy yet?

On average, people wait 6 years after the start of an issue before initiating therapy and in my experience, I find this to be true. No one runs to therapy, it really takes a lot of soul-searching to reach out. Even after making an appointment, there is a lot of nervousness about coming to your first appointment. Starting therapy is HARD. And scary! If you just don’t feel up for it yet, that’s okay. Really! Going to therapy when you aren’t ready won’t yield the results you’re looking for. You’ll feel frustrated and pressured to make changes that you’re not committed to.

So, you’re not ready to start therapy, but you are dissatisfied with some aspect of your life. Maybe you’re stressed about your performance at work, there’s distance in a relationship that’s important to you, or there has been so much going on lately you don’t even know where to begin! It doesn’t really matter what the specific details are, there are a few things that can start creating some relief for you right now.

Get back to basics. I focus a lot on sleep, diet, and exercise with my clients and constantly refer to them as the “low hanging fruit.” Have you been getting a full 8 hours of sleep each night? How many meals a day do you eat? When was the last time you exercised? These three things all require commitment and time. You’ll notice a change quickly once you get your physical body back into good health.
- Get 8 hours of sleep each night.
- Eat throughout the day, 3 meals or 6 small meals.
- Drink 64 oz. of water a day.
- Get 15-20 minutes of cardiovascular exercise a few times a week.
- Take a multivitamin.
- Schedule your annual checkup and dental cleaning.

Start a relaxation practice. Find 5-10 minutes each day that you can carve out for quiet. In this time, focus only on your breathe and your body. Let your brain get a chance to pause and turn off all the noise.
- Focus on your breathe and where you feel it in your body.
- Your mind will wander, that’s okay. When you notice it, let the thought pass and return to your breathe.
- Try to inhale to a count of 4, hold for a count of 7, and exhale to a count of 8. Count fast if you need to, it’s the ratio that matters.
- Make sure others know that you can’t be interrupted.
- If possible, go somewhere outside where it is quiet.
- Unplug from your phone and technology – even if it’s only 30 minutes.
- If you’re spiritual, you can incorporate prayer or meditation.

Get clarity on your own. One of the best ways to do some exploration about what is bothering you is to write. Get out a notepad and pen and start with “I want….” Don’t stop writing until you’ve written at least one full page. It’s important to write versus type so that you can slow your racing thoughts to the speed of your hand. Writing extensively forces us to push beyond our comfort and typical conclusions.
- Dedicate a notebook for your thoughts.
- Schedule a regular time to write, either every day or a 3-4 times a week.
- Write when you are alone.
- Don’t worry about grammar or neatness.

Start a small project. This can be something around your home or in your community. It doesn’t need to be expensive. It can be as simple as gathering donations, hanging up new artwork, painting something, an organization project, or starting a small challenge among your friends or co-workers.

Spread kindness. It may seem counterintuitive to turn outwards when we are struggling, but research shows that practicing kindness can boost your overall life satisfaction. An act of kindness can be as small as a smile to a passerby, picking up coffee for a co-worker, delivering a meal to a friend, or a call to check in with someone you love.

Set a small goal. Think of something that you can accomplish in the next couple of weeks and make a plan about how you’ll do it. Pick something that you can master and get excited about. For example, train for a 5K or read 1 book a month. Think of the activities you are passionate about and find a goal within that. Having direction and purpose that will culminate fairly soon should be a strong motivator.

Lastly, set a timetable. Try out some of the above techniques, which may take some time. Give yourself a check-in date to ask yourself where you are. Have things changed? Have you been feeling lighter? If you have tried all or just a few, but still don’t feel much relief, consider whether or not it would be a good time to ask a professional for help. Mental health professionals can offer new perspectives and coping skills that you haven’t tried. Starting therapy is hard, but carrying on burdensome feelings is even harder.

If you’re still not sure, give me a call. I’d love to help you sort through it.

By Tania|2019-10-11T17:13:44+00:00July 6th, 2017|Quick Tips|Comments Off

Why Therapy?

When I tell people I’m a therapist, it usually starts a string of questions. There are strong perceptions out there about what therapy is and isn’t. I’m hoping this first blog post will help clarify what people seem to be asking me:

So, what actually happens in therapy and why do people go to therapy?

First, let’s talk about the “what” part of that question. Therapy goes by many names – counseling, psychotherapy, talk therapy, coaching – but what it all boils down to is meeting with a mental health professional who is a 3^rd person. Meeting with someone who has no stake in the game allows you to be completely honest and say the things we often hesitate to say to our friends or family. Therapy is a safe place to discuss what’s going on in your head and heart. It is NOT me telling you what to do. The truth is most of us know how to solve our own problems. We struggle taking the first step and need a little space and clarity. Once we get that, we can take action.

Now, the “why.” Therapy in its best form is a preventative measure. Although people come to therapy with a specific concern in mind, we talk about it in a broader context. The point is to give you some coping skills, look for patterns in your past, and discover your personal values so that whatever you face in the future, you are better armed to handle it. Unfortunately life doesn’t come with a manual to handling the ups and downs, the stress, or the pain. Therapy can help you tune into yourself better so that your head and heart can become your manual.

One last point – no one comes to therapy without fear or worry. It’s completely normal to feel nervous about making a call or showing up to your first session. I get it, I’m a stranger and you’re about to share things that are personal and dear to you. I know that you may tell me things you have never said out loud. I know this is difficult and I think you’re brave for showing up. I don’t have any expectations or judgments about you. To be honest, the first thing I do is look for your strengths. Those strengths are usually our starting point. I also try to be as real and welcoming as possible. I use a lot of humor too. Most of the time people leave therapy feeling relief. And if you decided to try therapy and it doesn’t feel right, that’s okay too. My hope is that if you’re ready or looking for change, you give it a try. What do you have to lose?

If you need a little more evidence, check out the following articles about the benefits of therapy:

Putting Feelings Into Words Produces Effects in the Brain

The Effectiveness of Psychotherapy: The Consumer Reports Study

Psychodynamic Psychotherapy Brings Lasting Benefits through Self-Knowledge

By Tania|2017-07-02T01:12:14+00:00May 3rd, 2017|Benefits of Therapy, Therapy 101|Comments Off

About Tania

What happens in a therapy session?

What happens in a therapy session?

What if I’m not ready for therapy yet?

What if I’m not ready for therapy yet?

Why Therapy?